so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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