Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
Two bottles of champagne and half a pizza later, I'm crying myself to tears watching The Nanny. Happy finals week.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I'm sorry for aggressively singing the Frasier theme song at you so many times last night.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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