Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
