i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Well, you're 18 and dating a 28 year old. Who has a wife. Who isn't you. I would guess that's why your mom frowns upon the relationship.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
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