"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Apparently he's taking the slut he cheated on me with on a cruise for her birthday. THAT COULD HAVE BEEN ME. TITANTIC STYLE.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize
