goodnight i made you a song goodbye
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
We just stood on the porch wondering how you managed to puke up a whole piece of bologna
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
I'll give you another blowjob if you bring me some cake.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
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