he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize