Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
yea i thought the egg drop soup tasted weirdly like cum, and then i suddenly remembered what happened last night.
i'm never eating chinese again.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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