I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
Randomize
