I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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