Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Wedding update: no alcohol, 75% of people have left, no one is dancing, no single groomsmen, and it's 5:30. I'm going the fuck home to drink by myself.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Randomize
