The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I think I might have accidentally had a threesome last night with two good friends. See, this is what happens when you leave me.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
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