Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
I hated hipsters before it was mainstream.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
He told me that when he bends me over that chair I remind him of a bull rider. So thanks for being the ex that helps my present sex life
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
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