You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
you would pick up someone in the library
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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