She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
This guy legit just tried to LSAT formal logic his way into my pants. Contrapositives and everything.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Randomize
