shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I come bearing gifts of whiskey and vagina
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Randomize