I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
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