There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize