Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
i wish they had a 'baby daddy' section in halmark, like, "hey, i know you didn't want this child and you're doing a horrible job, but here's to making you cry on fathers day"
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
dude, i think i am in a porno. I was working out at the hotel gym and some chick was doing yoga and a guy comes up and says "good, now i know your flexible" then they started making out. WTF?
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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