You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I woke up with my bra stapled to the ceiling, her dad was in the hallway winking at me. I was the less drunk of the bunch.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
