Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
blow job with a beer in the shower, I just created the ultimate day spa for dudes
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
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