we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I'm training him to sit when I whistle the tune from the hunger games. I'm going to be the coolest parent ever.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize
