HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Through drunken recall, I have managed to bring back awful memories of losing my virginity. And possibly traumatized my niece trying to get her to "learn from my mistakes".
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Looking for my adderal, only found acid. What a shame
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
What you have to understand is that our lives aren't a disappointment so much as they crashed and burned with lethal doses of radiation and dog shit.
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