You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Me and this random chick had a conversation about how to save the world. 2 words: Dance. Battles. I love drunk heart to hearts in bar bathrooms.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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