i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Seriously he's so hot. And it's so hard to flirt with a deaf guy
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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