I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Do you think unemployment will give me a christmas bonus?
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
