We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize