Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize
