i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I never thought I'd have to apologize for tasting like absinthe and cheetos before tonight
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
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