Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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