Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
We are two peas in an std pod
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize