The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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