Pants 0. Shit 1.
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
I'm basically the yoda of knowing when someone wants to sleep with you
Randomize
