Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
My six-margarita-deep ass just used a blow torch to light the match that lit my bong pack. Peak single 🤦ðŸ¼â€â™€ï¸
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize
