So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
just printed out my drug dealers resume for him. guess the ecstasy scene slows down when kids move back home for the summer...
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
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