I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
For my 21st birthday, I require a kiddy pool filled with vodka. Make it so.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
