Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
How am I feeling this morning? Well, besides the fact that my vagina looks like a pair of giraffe's lips and I'm walking like an over-confident cowgirl, I'm fantastic. Thanks for your concern.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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