are you so shy because you have an std?
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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