We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
She was purple for Halloween. She literally spray-painted herself purple and called it a costume. It won't come off.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I REMEMBER NUGGETS BEING THERE BUT WE WERE AT A TACO BELL
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
Randomize