Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
our cab driver is having phone sex.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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