I must be too annoying 4 u.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
Slowly dying because of my period and my phone is mocking me because I have 69% battery
It goes to show, Sane person, daddy doms, little girls, all of us may seem different but deep inside we all grow wisdom teeth
Randomize
