We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Tell him "come over but don't bring a flaccid dick"
Wear something tight
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm getting married
To pizza
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
I know you would. And one day, we'll have a moment where i'll verbally assault a stranger for you.
Randomize
