Rock
Scissors
Fuck
My Higher Power is John Stamos
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
Timehop reminded me that 4 years ago today I helped a one armed man do the YMCA by being his other arm.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
I just realized I have a habit of pre gaming for therapy visits. Problem?
We'll discuss it when you get here
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
