He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
It's so hard to fall asleep when I can hear your genitals smacking against hers. I hate you with all the love in my heart.
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