Me too!
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
