Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
