This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
He keeps texting me videos of fish swimming in his fish tank, so I think it's safe to say he's back on weed.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Randomize
