Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I haven't been single on my birthday for 7 years. If you don't get me laid tonight, your best friend/wing woman status will be revoked.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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