She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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