It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Promise me you will not let me do anything sexual with or to a mini horse no matter how drunk we get. Ever.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
