I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
This show inspires me to have sex in space
Like if god were to send me a cock shot, that's what it would look like.
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Randomize
